How to Communicate in Relationship?

I've always had this problem in communication if I'm in a relationship and i think many of you have this problems too. How many times in your past can you recall getting upset with your partner?. This then turned into an argument and you left with nothing resolved? Correct? I belief it is natural to want to express your thoughts and concerns when you feel wronged. However, it is also less natural for us to genuinely listen to the other person's point of view. This is the problem i think in humans.....

I find it that after relationships you learn through experience and practice to stop and listen when all you want is to get your point across. Everyone wants to be heard, genuinely heard, when expressing feelings. Sometimes when you approach someone from the "I" standpoint instead of the "you" standpoint, it changes the whole ways of communicaiton completely.

I've learn to take responsibility for my own actions and feelings to reduce the likelyhood of defence. I understand that relationships needs to be built on respect for one another!. I really find this very important. Again, it is ok to be upset with someone, the way you approach the situation can make a huge difference in the outcome.

I've got a few points here which i've heard and read about:-

1. Practice
Take ownership and responsibility for what you bring to the relationship. Instead of the "blame game", try approaching the situation with an open mind resulting in a solution as the end result.

2. Stop and listen
Next time you get upset with someone, be prepared to stop and really listen to what they have to say. Before jumping the gun and overreacting, take a deep breath and prepare how you want to approach the situation. Envision the end result in a positive manner with both parties being able to express everything without blame. This week practice the art of really listening. Take time to stop and really hear what the other person has to say.

3. Remember how it feels
Remember how it feels when you've been genuinely heard and understood? It is difficult to get upset when you feel understood, when there is little blame and more understanding of each other's point of view. Keep this in focus.